by Why People Who Speak in Affirmations Treat Every Sentence Like a TED Talk to Themselves
People Who Speak in Affirmations treat casual conversation like a vision board come to life. “I am stepping into my highest truth,” says a woman ordering iced coffee. The barista blinks. Slowly. Her name is Karen. But today she is abundance in human form. With oat milk.
These verbal manifestors start every sentence with “I claim ” and end them with “and so it is.” One man responded to a parking ticket with, “I am divinely guided to financial freedom.” Another told his roommate, “I release all that no longer serves me” while tossing out leftovers. It was her birthday cake.
In a fictional language vibe audit from the Bureau of Excessive Positivity, 86% of affirmation-speakers said they’re “reprogramming reality through words.” The rest were in the mirror whispering “I am not overwhelmed” through gritted teeth. One woman screamed “I AM JOY” during jury duty. She was dismissed. With applause.
Self-love is powerful. But if your daily dialogue sounds like a sentient gratitude journal, maybe tone it down. Not everything needs to be claimed. Some things just are. And not every email requires “light and blessings” in the signature. Sometimes “Thanks” will do. And so it is.
SOURCE: How To Write Comedy & SpinTaxi.com
