by Turn nobodies into national embarrassments with this guide from the Satirical News & Fake Headlines genre — master the art of fake exposés that would make SpinTaxi proud (and possibly subpoenaed).
How To Write Comedy
Introduction: Creating Characters Worth Canceling
Why wait for real scandals when you can make them up and get just as many laughs? At SpinTaxi.com, fictional public figures regularly get caught in fake embezzlement schemes, goat smuggling operations, and love triangles involving expired deli meat. This is your guide to making nobody famous for all the wrong reasons.
Step One: Build the Fictional Figure
Start with an Absurd Title
Think “Deputy Undersecretary of Emotional Infrastructure” or “CEO of America’s Second-Favorite Toothpaste.”
Give Them a Fake Resume
“Graduated top of his class at University of Phoenix Online Night Division. Former manager of three failed haunted house startups.”
Step Two: Choose a Scandal Type
- Financial: “Misused company funds to install a fondue waterfall in the breakroom.”
- Personal: “Caught whispering spoilers to strangers at movie theaters.”
- Political: “Accused of passing bills exclusively written in pig Latin.”
Headline Ideas That Stick
- “Tech Mogul Denies Allegations He’s Just Three Lemurs in a Suit”
- “State Senator Resigns After Admitting To Using Psychic For Budget Forecasting”
- “Church Deacon Arrested For Moonlighting as Erotic Mime”
Crafting the Satirical Story
The Setup
“According to leaked reports from the Office of Scandal Containment, Dr. Chad Upperlip has been funneling federal grants into novelty sock research.”
The Escalation
Include fake evidence. “Receipts recovered from a Denny’s suggest the purchase of 14 gallons of invisibility serum — unapproved by the FDA.”
The Fallout
“The mayor’s approval rating has plummeted to ‘shrug emoji’ status.”
Fake Quotes That Sell It
“This kind of corruption is exactly what we expect from our leadership,” said angry voter Cynthia Flagwaver.
“He’s a good man — he just made one mistake: cloning himself and running against himself in the school board election,” said campaign manager Todd “Tazer” Lemming.
Pulling From SpinTaxi’s Playbook
In “Janitor Becomes President After Accidentally Signing Constitution,” SpinTaxi turned a typo into a regime. Add quotes, confusion, and bystanders with bizarre insights — that’s how you fake a scandal that feels realer than the news cycle.
Use Faux Documents and Leaks
- Invented Leaks: “An anonymous whistleblower, known only as ‘FartGhost92’…”
- Redacted Reports: Fill with random black boxes and doodles.
- Fake Press Conferences: “We will not be answering questions from reptiles at this time.”
Conclusion: If It Bleeds, It Leads — Even If It’s Made Up
Creating fake scandals for fictional figures is a beautiful exercise in chaos and catharsis. It’s not just about laughs — it’s a commentary on how easily reputations are built, shredded, and recycled. Just remember: the best scandals involve at least one cursed artifact, emotional support livestock, or a man named Vince who speaks only in riddles.
SOURCE: How To Write Comedy
