by Write tributes that no one asked for in the Satirical News & Fake Headlines category — like SpinTaxi’s viral obit for “Chad, the Wi-Fi Router Who Died So We Could Zoom.”
How To Write Comedy
Introduction: In Loving, Confused Memory
Obituaries are supposed to honor lives. Satirical obituaries instead eulogize the awkward, the inanimate, and the occasionally sentient. At SpinTaxi.com, obits have been published for failed startups, expired coupons, and the last decent avocado in Cincinnati. It’s time to say goodbye poorly.
Why Satirical Obituaries Work
They Combine Formality with Foolishness
There’s something inherently funny about treating the death of a spatula like the fall of a statesman.
They Let You Build Character from Closure
The best obits tell a story — even if it’s about a haunted recliner who died doing what it loved: refusing to close fully.
Step One: Pick Your “Deceased”
- Object: Left sock, discontinued shampoo, GPS with trust issues
- Concept: Your twenties, customer service, emotional availability
- Personified Nonsense: Hope, weekends, your ex’s hairline
Write the Obituary
Headline:
“Rest in Peace, Gerald: The Office Plant Who Knew Too Much”
Opening Paragraph:
“Gerald, a ficus of unknown origin and unparalleled judgment, passed away Tuesday under suspiciously moist circumstances. He was 7 (pot years).”
Survived By:
- Janet (a cactus with boundary issues)
- The window blinds (who always resented him)
- Several paperclips still traumatized by a 2019 pruning incident
Cause of Death:
“Alleged overwatering, though coworkers suspect corporate espionage.”
SpinTaxi Example
In “Obituary: Clippy, Microsoft’s Former Paperclip Advisor, Dies After Final Update,” SpinTaxi chronicled Clippy’s dramatic fall from assistant to existential artifact. The piece was banned from three LinkedIn accounts and nominated for zero awards.
Include Funeral Details
- “Services will be held in Conference Room B, assuming no one booked it for improv team building.”
- “Mourning attire should be casual, bitter, and potted.”
- “Instead of flowers, please donate unresolved tension to your nearest middle manager.”
Common Pitfalls
- Being too silly without sincerity: A good satirical obit reads like someone cared just not quite enough.
- Forgetting the format: Stick to obituary structure for maximum contrast.
- Making it too long: Let the absurdity bloom, then die quickly — like Gerald.
Conclusion: Farewell, and Also Please Return Your Keycard
Fake obituaries let you say goodbye to objects, emotions, or ideals that never stood a chance. Treat them with respect, sprinkle in surreal backstory, and don’t forget: even expired yogurt deserves a dignified sendoff. Press F to pay ridiculous respects.
SOURCE: How To Write Comedy
