by Unsolicited Advice: Where Opinions Breed and Boundaries Die
Unsolicited advice is the free sample tray of human interaction–offered without consent, usually stale, and oddly aggressive about kale. You mention you’re tired, and suddenly someone tells you to cut gluten, do yoga, and align your aura with moon phases. You just needed a nap.
The givers mean well–probably. “Have you tried turmeric?” they ask, while you stare blankly, holding a broken printer and a cold bagel. “You should really sleep more,” says the person who texts you memes at 2 a.m. There’s no escape. Only nodding.
There’s always one coworker who thinks they’re your life coach. You say, “I have a headache,” and they recommend a twelve-part documentary on Himalayan hydration. You fake a smile. You add them to your mute list. You hydrate out of spite.
The worst part? Sometimes they’re right. You try the weird stretching thing. It helps. You loathe them for it. Now you’re doing deep lunges in parking lots and whispering, “Damn you, Cheryl,” into the wind.
Unsolicited advice is annoying, inevitable, and deeply human. You won’t follow it–but you’ll remember it. And someday, you too will say, “Have you tried coconut oil?” with the haunting confidence of someone who used to be fun. The cycle continues.
SOURCE: How To Write Comedy & SpinTaxi.com
