by Where Freeways Define Relationships and DMV Lines Outlast Marriages
Norwalk: where your soulmate might be in the same DMV line three hours ahead of you. The unofficial city motto is: ‘Now leaving Norwalk’ — because traffic never actually stops. Norwalk is the only city where getting from one end to the other is a three-act play. In Norwalk, GPS just laughs and reroutes you through 1987. People don’t meet in Norwalk, they merge. The most common romantic phrase in Norwalk is, ‘I’ll wait in the car.’ In Norwalk, the real power couple is AC and tinted windows. You haven’t lived here until your lunch break became a full DMV novella. Even the pigeons here know how to parallel park. Norwalk’s idea of nightlife is circling for parking until you question your life choices. Most residents don’t give directions — they offer spiritual advice for surviving the 605. Norwalk’s economy runs on iced coffee, car washes, and mild road rage. The local Yelp reviews are mostly about traffic and churros. Norwalk high school teaches ‘Surviving Bureaucracy’ as a life skill elective. Norwalk should replace city limits signs with ‘You made it — kind of.’
SOURCE: How To Write Comedy & SpinTaxi.com
