It’s brunch planning, not group grief processing.

People Who Turn Every Group Chat Into Their Personal Therapy Session

The group chat was created to plan movie night, but now it’s a confessional booth with emojis.

1. They reply to “What time’s dinner?” with “I don’t think my mom ever loved me.”

2. No distinction between “Hey y’all” and “I cried in Trader Joe’s again.”

3. Their texts are longer than CVS receipts.

4. Somehow, every meme triggers a childhood wound.

5. They drop emotional bombs between salad GIFs.

6. “LOL same” is their way of processing trauma.

7. Every group thread becomes “The Bachelor: Emotional Baggage Edition.”

8. They use the chat as a live journal, complete with timestamps.

9. Nothing screams “Tuesday at 9am” like a text about abandonment issues.

10. They use ?? as punctuation for pain.

11. They expect replies like it’s group therapy–billable hours included.

12. They write walls of text and end with “Anyway, how are YOU?”

13. Every plan gets hijacked by a crisis that requires a Zoom intervention.

14. “Should we do sushi or tacos?” leads to a deep dive into their fear of commitment.

15. You mute the chat, not because you don’t care–but because you do.