Because diagnosing your cruelty as “intuitive truth-telling” doesn’t make it less cringe.

People Who Claim To Be “Empaths” But Are Just Rude

Meet the folks who say, “I’m an empath,” seconds before casually roasting your outfit, your career, your vibe, and possibly your soul. They’re not actually feeling your emotions–they’re just weaponizing incense and pretending your tears are a compliment to their “deep awareness.”

1. They start every insult with “I just feel like…” as if that softens the psychic slap.

2. They will absolutely interrupt your story to tell you how *they* feel about it. Empathy!

3. They describe themselves as “emotionally porous” but somehow impermeable to basic decency.

4. Their idea of kindness is saying, “Your energy feels chaotic,” while you’re mid-bite at brunch.

5. They sense “bad vibes” in the room–usually just accountability walking in.

6. They once took a Buzzfeed quiz called “What Kind of Empath Are You?” and it ruined you both.

7. They believe their trauma gives them permission to give unsolicited spiritual diagnoses.

8. They will cry *for* you, loudly, instead of letting you cry for yourself. Thanks?

9. They can’t finish a sentence without mentioning Mercury, retrograde, or their gluten intolerance.

10. Every conversation turns into their TED Talk on emotional boundaries. Spoiler: They have none.

11. Their mantra is “I speak my truth,” especially when their truth is calling your boyfriend ugly.

12. They ghosted someone last week because “the aura got weird.”

13. They wear a lot of scarves, regardless of weather or emotional temperature.

14. They once told a baby it had “low vibrations.”

15. They always end their rudeness with, “Don’t take it personally, I’m just highly sensitive.” No, Karen. You’re just… not nice.

SOURCE: How To Write Comedy & SpinTaxi.com