by What the Funny People Are Saying About Kate Middleton Going Blonde…
“Kate Middleton’s hair has gone so blonde, the Queen’s ghost just asked if she could borrow her for the Christmas lights switch-on.”
“She’s blonder than a pint of lager at Wetherspoons. And just as likely to cause arguments on a Sunday morning.”
“When your wife goes blonde, you’re supposed to compliment her. William just said, ‘You look… different,’ like a man filling out a police sketch.”
“British tabloids treated her new highlights like it was a second moon landing. Meanwhile, my nan dyed hers in the sink for a fiver.”
“She’s gone blonde in Scotland, which is brave. One gust of wind and suddenly it’s Braveheart: The Conditioner Edition.”
“I don’t think it’s fair. Kate goes blonde, everyone applauds. When I do it, people ask if I’m joining a boy band.”
“Her hair’s so blonde now, it qualified for a tax break as renewable energy.”
“William must be terrified. Every time Kate gets a new look, he has to age five years to keep up.”
“Her highlights are so golden, I nearly pawned them to pay my gas bill.”
“It’s not just blonde. It’s that posh blonde where you can practically hear the vowels stretching.”
“Kate Middleton went blonde, and British men collectively sighed. Not because it’s sexy—because it means they’ll be dragged into a salon ‘just for a trim’ that costs £200.”
“Honestly, her new shade isn’t ‘blonde.’ It’s ‘Royal Honey with Just a Hint of Brexit Regret.’”
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Kate Middleton Going Blonder…
