by Smiling through the psychological manipulation
Welcome to the “Good Vibes Only” community–where you’re not allowed to be sad, skeptical, or wear neutral colors. Frowns will be forcibly converted to gratitude journals.
1. The Cult Uniform
Pastel yoga pants, oversized smiles, and crystals in every pocket.
2. The Forbidden Emotion List
Anger? Banned. Sadness? Illegal. Hangry? Grounds for expulsion.
3. The Chanting Schedule
“Positive affirmations every hour, on the hour, or you owe the universe an apology.”
4. The Guru With Wi-Fi
Follow @Sunbeam_Spirit69 for daily enlightenment and MLM invites.
5. The Escape Plan
It involves fake smiling your way out while holding a vision board and whispering, “I am abundant.”
“Good Vibes Only” cults: where emotions go to die, and Instagram enlightenment costs $299/month.
SOURCE: How To Write Comedy & SpinTaxi.com
