Where doublets meet disciplinary write-ups.

People Who Dress Like They’re in a Renaissance Fair But Work in HR

They wield the power of corporate policy with the flair of a lute-playing bard. These are the majestic few who, for reasons known only to their souls (and possibly a Dungeons & Dragons campaign), dress like it’s 1432 but send you Outlook calendar invites.

1. They deliver sexual harassment training while wearing a leather corset and quoting Chaucer.

2. Their cubicle has a “Ye Olde Suggestion Box.” It’s shaped like a goblet and smells like cloves.

3. They call performance reviews “Annual Reckonings.” You fear there may be a duel involved.

4. They once denied someone vacation time via scroll and wax seal.

5. Every “All Staff” email is signed, “With honor and fortitude, Dame Brenda of Payroll.”

6. You asked for a new office chair. You were given a wooden throne and told to sit with nobility.

7. They refer to the copier as “The Mechanical Scribe.” It’s jammed. Again.

8. Their business cards are parchment and include their “House Sigil.”

9. You called in sick. They replied, “A pox upon thee? Nay, take thy rest, noble peasant.”

10. Their Teams status is often “At Feast” or “Questing.”

11. Casual Friday means wearing chainmail instead of full plate armor.

12. They once turned a Diversity & Inclusion seminar into a dramatic reenactment of the Council of Elrond.

13. They refer to the CEO as “The High Chancellor” and only approach him with bowed head.

14. They celebrate birthdays by leading a procession with a dulcimer and a dragon hand puppet.

15. HR complaints are filed under “Grievances of Ye Realm.” They are handled… eventually, by falcon.

SOURCE: How To Write Comedy & SpinTaxi.com